I really, really like this color! Don't you think it's so pretty?
I am moving my blog. Where to? I shant say for now. But trust me. It's going to be hella pretty.

In fact, this is going to be my last entry in alessa.blogspot.com
Thanks Blogger. You've been nothing but fun but yet annoying with your maintainence 24/7.
Thanks tayre darling for telling and reminding me to change my blog! : )
I'd miss blogspot.com...but not for long.. heheh

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

If this is not love, what is?

song playin - vulnerable

What constitutes the end of the relationship?
Is it when the both parties agree to the separation? Or is it when one, just one party opens his/her mouth first? Or is it when the 2 of you feel obligated to do things for each other, to meet and go out with each other? [this I learnt from Edric...not that we are obliged to do things for each other, but he taught me such things..] Or is it only over when you totally feel nothing of the same sort like before? Is it when either one of you stop trying to work at your relationship, to stop making things right and oh-so-wonderful? Is it when you feel nothing but pain, hurt and jealous enraged inside you? Is it when you are feeling like the icy Ice Queen/King and that your heart stops beating for the other? Isn't that just pure foolishness inside you that has awoken you from a long sleep of lies you've been living in?

Thoughts running through in my mind recently. I just hate the absolute thought of the bad. It saddens me. It makes me cry. Surprising to many, I am a pure, 100% softy. I do not let people see the real me easily. In this entire world, only about 5 people know the real me. These 5 people get to see the real me.That's scary isn't it? I don't think I'm the only one that behaves in this manner, am I right? Everyone's afraid of how others see them, afraid to open up to their deepest, most honest self with the fear of being hurt, ridiculed, mocked, harmed, all these worrying and negative fears and "what if's" instilled in them. These 5 people, do I have to mention names? Bri, Mich, Brian & D.Andy & Edric. The former 2 are amazing. They are girlfriends that will laugh and cry with you. Girlfriends that hold your hair when you are dead drunk and puking. Girlfriends that will curse your boyfriends even though you were wrong because all the time, all they want to do is to let you know that they care.
Andy, Brian. These 2 names. Guys that love me, guys that want to spoil me. At times, I know this friendship will come to an end. You'd move on and realise I am not all that little girl that you always forever want to spoil. It's not your duty... But I appreciate every one thing you have done for me. Andy, I will, will, will cry when you leave this summer for uni back in Aust. You've been wonderful.
Edric. The true one. It's funny. Just 7 months ago, he didn't exist in my life. I didn't know his name. Didn't know anything about him except he hangs out with the girls in his class an awful lot. -smiles- I honestly would be missing out on so much. Edric's the one that looks out for me. He's the kind who doesn't judge. The kind who listens, advice. The kind that swallows his pride, puts it aside because sometimes pride just hurts others. He is the kind who checks on you every now and then when you're ill, coming over in the wee hours of the morning to kiss me and watch you sleep. He's the sort who loves with all his heart and wants the best for everyone.
I admit it. I do love him with all my heart. I admit it that I am yearning for his love and affection practically all the time. I think about us all the time. Is that wrong to do so? However, I do stress on this... I love him sensibly. I do. I place him before me because I want to and I feel it's the only right thing to do. Why so? Ask yourself this, doesn't every parent want what's the best for your mother? I remember being a little girl and my mammy always gives me the fleshiest part of the fish, while she'd eat the bitter part - the stomach. That's only because she loves me and wants to feed me the good stuff. Same theory applied in different situations.
He is beautiful. Edric has the biggest heart ever and the kindest soul. And I am appreciative and thankful for everything. I have my doubts and insecurities, more than ever of late. It's horrible. I say not because I do not wish to make him feel that he has not done his part to make me feel at ease or that he hasn't been loving me enough. It doesn't work that. He loves me fine... he loves me well and it's just human nature to feel that way isn't it?

Yesterday, I had a wonderful date with Edric. Sorry Denise, we didn't make it to your house. Some other time perhaps?
Anyway, thank you darling. The dinner was great... movie was great.. (urm, you know what I mean). Foot reflexology. Mmmmmm, very soothing all right. : )
Best was that we got to spend time and have a nice intimate talk again. I enjoyed the "reassurance" talk last night/morning while in bed, with you hugging me. I couldn't ask for more. Everything's said in the email and you just know how I feel.
I love you..

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Hunny came over last night to talk to me and guess who he brought? Donut! : )
I like Donut. He doesn't bite and he's pretty obedient! And he reminds me of me. Wanting affection most of the time. -laughs- So cute. It's a really adorable sight that makes you go "awwww" when you see Edric playing with Donut. Hella cute! Next time we get a Yorkshire terrier and an English tabby ya baby? -grins-

So much to say about last night, but its all private and I dont want to share my intimacy and private talks with my babycakes on the Internet. Its all inside. And we both know it. Our hearts beat as one...... It all comes down to the fact that we always work things out and understand each other better. Baby, you're now sick.. Do take care of yourself. Read my messages to you on ICQ. Remember, if you need me in the middle of the night, call me.. -hugs- Love you hunny bunny!

Gonna go surf the net now...one more cute piccy before I leave..



love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Go, go, go, go
"Go, go, go shawty
It's your birthday
We gon' party like it's yo birthday
We gon' sip Bacardi like it's your birthday
And you know we don't give a fuck
It's not your birthday!"

Love this song. Love love love it. Finally gonna get my 50 cent cd this week. Just watched the video too. It's so hella dopa. (Oh god, missy elliot on mtv jams now. she produces crap stuff now ever since all that adidas crap. It's Adidas i say. -laughs) Never though Eminem could come up with 50 cent, something bigger and better than D12. Not saying there's anything wrong with them. But 50 cent is gonna be the absolute best rapper of this year. However, I must emphasize, no one beats the king himself, TuPac. RIP. I cannot wait for this song to be played in the club, where I can dance my arse off. It's just way too sexy and massive. Oh mama!

Nico, my nigga-wannabe,your promise with the pictures ya. Be good when you see Blackchild. We know he's hot stuff and it's Murder. Who can behave? -laughs- Pyschotic bitches.

Darling just called. My poor baby has to slog in school. I miss him. He has so much work to do. So do I actually, but I guess I work pretty fast and organized so I don't fall back. Guess we won't be spending too much time with each other this week, but it's okay. I can survive. I can. Gonna go out, meet Andy for a bit just to get my valentine's day present. I wonder what it could be. Andy spoils me mad crazy.. I know he loves me and tries to buy my love. Imma kiddin! He just really really likes to make all my dreams come true. It makes me feel so god-damn awful cause I know I'd never be able to reciprocate his love back. Damn. I hope it's something from GUCCI or DIOR or babyphat : ) Hehe, no matter what, I hope he never stops spoiling me, even when he leaves to go back to Australia or when he has a girl to call his own. I'm always his no.1 girl to spoil for lyfe. I've got wonderful grader friends I say.. : )

P. called again. Andy cussed at him. He isn't giving me the apology I demand and deserve. The mutha-f**ker [darling, i know you dont like me to cuss, but when it now comes to him, i get hella pissed, forgive me.] So yeah, he can piss off and get rid outta my life until I recieve my apology, then i'd CONSIDER forgiving you. When, I forgive, but never forget. So what ya gonna do about it? P, I know you read this. So get this into your mind, you are a sad sad bastard. Think ya gonna ruin my life and make me forever guilty? I was initially. You promised you'd always love me. It's nothing but a pack of lies, take your filthy mouth and hands away from me. You make me laugh and made me doubt the power of love, trust and understanding. I think you work for the devil. Think you can come in between me and my faith? Think again? Think I am being a major bitch? Given the circumstances, you've not seen the worst of me yet. I shall be the better the person and wait for my apology.
I have my baby to stand by me to give me support, to tell me I'm not wrong. He makes it all so clear who's right and who's wrong. You suck, Philip.

Gonna go meet Andy now and be back by 11. Wanna watch the new reality telly show. It's so lame, it makes it all so interesting! -grins-

Edric, I Love You!

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Went to meet Mich before I went back. Needed to just be in the presence of someone who cares..
It was a wierd day. Stayed in school, did a lot of work.. Photocopied a lot of crap, which hopefully, would turn into useful information to my advantage by tomorrow. I was feeling miserably cold but at least I had my off-white pashmina with me. I sat down, recieved a message from overseas. It was the first time Mr.P messaged me. It said:
"How have you been? I've been seeing someone, someone professional who can help me.
Help me with the pain I am going through.."

I froze. No apology? I don't deserve it? And then it all boils down to me thinking, "What have I done to him?" I start thinking, and I decided, I am not ready to apologize now or in the future. I don't have to. I didn't do anything wrong. He didn't get it. I made it so amazingly clear to him, that it all comes down to one. I've chosen the other, get a grip. Damn you P! You deserve a huge ass kick from us all when you get back...

Anyway, thanks to Mich & Andy for always being my lovey chums! -hugs-
Denise and I are going to watch a play at Esplanade. Good thing is my sis and Joni are involved in the play (well, my sis was supposed to) and I know Brian, the director. So we get 4 free tickets! Wanna take my boo too and denise will have to bring someone along too. Can't wait!

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S Today turned out pretty well too. Guess my baby loves me afterall!

20 more days till our 7th month anniversary!

I really like doing these sort of countdowns.. Yes, I am a dorkette. I get bored easily.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

14th February 2003 - Valentine's Day


Left to Right: Edric Hunny, Me, Swee Long outside Zouk at about 0140 hrs..

Well, actually that was actually more like 15th February 2003. Okay, so we had Turkish dinner, urm, can't say much about it. -laughs- But thanks for dinner baby.. I appreciated it a lot. Oh, we got to go on our monorail again didn't we? -smiles- It was tons fun....



Oh, then we decided to take a long long long LONG walk! But we got pretty pictures taken!


And then we just ended up at Zouk to meet Daniel. Swee Long later joined us too. It took me a while to get into the whole mood because of the dress I was wearing! -laughs- Never have I ever worn a dressy tube dress (GUCCI baybbeeee) and heels to go clubbing. It's very unclubby like. It's not hip-huggin. But later, it wasn't all that bad because the loads of girls that streamed in were decked in even dressier, girlier dresses with florals, etc. : )
But Phuture as usual was playing their R&B, mixes of Slow Jams and Hip Hop (crap).. dancing with my boo is so incredibly seksi!!!! It was a wierd scene though, guess because it was V-day, at least 60% of those at Zouk/Phuture were paired up couples! Quite a pretty sight if you ask me...
Just one last picture of the 3 of us chillin outside, taking a breather..

Yes, I look hella estranged in this picture! No, I wasn't drunk Michie!!

Today, boo made me breakfast in bed. I liked it a lot... So thoughful of you. I am sorry I made you stand in the pouring rain for so long! I didn't know you called! I am so sorry. I feel so bad and was so worried that you were going to fall sick because of getting caught and STUCK in the rain. Yay! Got to wake up to you again, hugged each other so much while sleeping last night.... Thanks hunny bunny... Let's sleepover again! -kusje-
I love you.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Seems like everyone had a good valentine's day..

song playin - dark beat
Baby, this song is just for you...


Made a new sig for him. I just really enjoy doing this kind of things for him because I like it that he likes it so much that it makes him smile. Sweet. Like this new sig hunny? Good Lord, I am really so much in love with you... Not that I am complaining because I am enjoying every moment of it! Even when we are having bad times and disputes, I look forward to making up with you. Bloody hell, it's fun to make up AND make out with you. : )

Want to see new piccy's of my boo hard at the lab today?


Isn't my baby so cute? I have a video of him, until I learn how to convert it and place a video image on my page, you guys can't experience his cuteness here.. : )

But what made him smile was this.... (i surprised him at school with the help of his friend, Swee Long..thanks a lot! : )

I seriously suspect he loves the Jordan 16s more than he loves me. Seriously speaking. I'm not surprised. Oh well... As long as it makes you happy hunny bunny.

Went to visit Miko (Ethan) in the hospital today.. I felt like crying... My poor god-brother.. I feel your pain dear boy. Don't worry both your jie jies and me are always here to get thru it. No matter how bad the medication, you must be a big boy and not cry. He lost the radiance he always had, the strong presence he had around him. Poor Mich, I feel awful... Darling Miko, wish I could do something to take away your pain... -sigh-

Chinese New Year is coming to an end... Damn, no excuse for buying new clothes without the guilt, etc. No more visiting and gobbling down the food without the guilt again. But it's all good, cause that's the worst part of CNY. Speaking of which, I didn't visit your parents, Edric hunny. That isn't very nice of me, isn't it? Damn.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S Hunny, Happy Valentine's Day! -kusje-

song playin - Last Temptation

I don't like it that Ja's last album is so good. It makes me crave for more Ja. I remember I totally flipped when I got his CD back in HK. Damn. Oh well, this is one of my fave. songs from it cause Charli's featured on it. Rock on baby.




I finally got a pair of new shoes. (other than heels and boots that is.)

Yes, I am that pathetic, I own more heels than anything else. I admit it, I have an expensive shoe and bag fetish. And when I say that, I am picky. I admit, I am brand conscious, but only if I can afford it. I don't mean just buying tons of cheap bags from like Far East and crap. I can't explain it, but labels have prettier stuff like Marc Jacobs "New York at Night" black clutch purse, Nine West's pretty leather bags and the oh-so-cute Dior Saddle bags now. And shoes from Miu miu are so cute! Diesel shoes are feminine and yet so masculine. Just the way I like it. Gucci and Dior. Need I say more?
Guess.. Mmmm... : ) Baby Phat makes the word "phat" surreal. But of course, it doesn't imply I am stuck up or that I don't have cheap stuff. Today, I wore a dirt cheap black lycra camisole from Zara (only 12.90) and a simple black linen skirt which cost 12 bucks too (thanks mich).. Maybe my sexy pink Roxy handbag cost a lot more, but it implies I don't go for only brands but simply what I like best. I like the labels because of their uniqueness and personal style. Their signature bags, glasses, etc makes it all so alluring and appealing as compared to unknown labels who change and imitate fashion from all sort every other month. I don't like change, so classic is the way to go.

Oh well, high maintenance? I don't think so.
Seriously.

Hung out with my favourite person in the world today. Boo! Sorry if I bored you, making you do silly chores with me but that's how I run errands.. So sorry, so glad to spend some alone time with you finally after all these times..Really missed the hell out of it!! Anyway, can't wait to talk to you later. Be waitin for you to finish your work.. Take your time...work's more important. -knuffel-

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Zouk - 7th February 2003


Janice (in black) and Me (in white) in Zouk (yes, yes, we sneaked in a camera)

I wanna party party party and dance the night away. Let my hair down and forget about everything like SCHOOL. Screw that. But y'know what? I wanna dance with my boo only! -grins- Short blog, I love you Edric.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

A new sig for my baby.Half a year has passed. I've been with Edric for that long. This is seriously my longest relationships. Looking back, I am pretty amazed at myself. I know all my friends are. They go like "What? You manage to stay with him for more than a month? Congratulations!" Now's it's like this "OH MY GOD, half a year? Alessa, this is the real thing isn't it? You're really going to stay engaged and marry him?" So it gets me thinking, "Why of course, an engagement IS a promise to get married and I don't break promises." Here's what Mich (Stylin^Gurl) said to me(Foxy^Dawl) today on MSN. Ignore our nicknames, we were trying to act ghetto. -laughs-
Stylin^Gurl - Dude, I am giving Andy his shirt on V-day! You?
Foxy^Dawl - I gave him his today, remember?
Stylin^Gurl - OHHHHHHH : ) Tell me! Has our baybee gurl finally decided to settle down???
Foxy^Dawl - Pretty mucha so! -laughs- Good lord Mich, when was the last time I was serious with one guy in an exclusive relationship?!?!?
Stylin^Gurl - Lemme see, in 8th grade onwards, there was Mark, Tobias, Shaun, Kieran, Andy, Dirty Andy, Tim, Daan, Mark L, Terence, Ngov, Tiger, Willem, Joe, Robi, Martin, and who could forget the ass Gonz?? And oohhh, rem the cute guy KOEN?? Martijn too...
Foxy^Dawl - Oh shit, did I date soooo much???
Stylin^Gurl - No, I made it all up. What ya think??? ; )
Stylin^Gurl - Seriously, when can I meet the groom?
Foxy^Dawl - when B. comes back aight chica???
Stylin^Gurl - gr88 chickadooooooo...
Foxy^Dawl - man I am so tired...
Stylin^Gurl - yeah, and I need to go on a fukkkennn diet!

-laughs- What kinda convo was that between me and mich? The last 2 sentences were really in total NO RELATION to each statement. That's how pathetic we are. Anyway, things have been happening between me and him these past 2 weeks or so because of alcohol which causes you do to stupid ass shit which hurt the ones you love most. I assure you and will always assure you as long as you need it, that I love only you because it's all true. I have so much to say to you regarding what you were feeling that day, but I only want to do it face-to-face. I thank you for coming over last night... It was nice to have to you in my bed again. Told you my mum likes you better than she likes me. Once she heard you were sick and sleeping in my bed, she went out to buy meat to cook you meat porridge. : ) Welcome to the family baby.


You look so darn cute.

Was out with DD last night and getting my boy's stuff, just in case you guys are wondering what I got him, I shan't say..not just yet. Hmm, don't you guys think the Palm Tungsten is so pretty? : ) 6 items.. : Black Polo Tee from Ralph Lauren, Short Sleeve Shirt (guess style) from Polo Ralph Lauren too, Mrs Fields brownies and cookies, photo frame, pillow, hand-made love cert and lastly, well...that's a surprise. : )
Anyway, when out with DD, we were talking about old songs we used to like.. And I came up with a few... Oh, the memories. :)
-Hold On (Wilson Philips)
-Oh baby I (Eternal)
-Every rose has its thorn (Poison)
-The Earth, the sun, the rain (Color me Badd)
-Should be missing you (Boyzone)
-Love ain't here anymore (Take That)
-Always (Bon Jovi)
-Someday I'll be Saturday Night (Bon Jovi)
-One more Chance (Madonna)
-Love & Affection (Nelson)

The good old times... : )
I need a break..... A good old break. I miss my baby even though he left a few hours ago. I love you Baby..You treat me the best and you're just so true to me! I can't wait for another sleepover with you again.. This time, I woke up hugging you from the back and the other time, you were holding me, it was all so amazingly blissful! -smiles- I can't believe it. Am I dreamin? If I am, I never want to wake up but guess what? It IS REALITY.

Yay.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Sean, Me and Shirl in town yesterday, well, last evening outside lucky plaza. Yes, I look retarded all right. Urm, I wasn't very prepared for the shot which explains urm, my very unpretty expression. -laughs-

By the way, check this out..


JEALOUS?
I am such an arse don't you think? : )

Something's wrong, something's wrong all right. And I hate not knowing what it is. I hate it all the time.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

*new song*

like it? bite me if you don't. -laughs- Fabolous totally rules.. : )

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S GOT MY IXUS!! : )

CERTIFIED: SCHOOL IS A PAIN IN THE ARSE.
Freezing my arse off in the Amadeus lab, just an hour more and off school BUT I have to go do some site inspection for a club. This sucks. I still have errands to run, like look for my new digicam! : ) Bruv says I should seriously consider getting the Ixusv3, which was what I wanted all along but the price just didn't seem to get along with me. : ) But it's been at least half a year now, I'm sure the price would have dropped by a decent amount, right? Right?

Still have other errands to do of course. There are honestly too little hours in a day to do everything.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S Miss you Baby boy! : ) Your msg made me smile.

So much on my mind. Just 8 more weeks of school for this semester. I can endure it. I know I can. Then holidays and internship for half a year. I need to get away from certain people in school. They disgust me. I shant talk about it here. Well, not now anyway. : )

I think I am in such crap moods lately, always shouting at my baby.I remember last night when my leg hurt and I wanted to just hang up with him. Sorry hunny. I just didn't feel like talking all that much cause I was really in pain. -sigh- I had a dream last night. That I went to your place with my sister cause we dropped you off, and your mother was sitting at the porch, sipping away her tea. And when she saw me, she told me to stay away from you. That's one thing I dread most, that parents don't like me and always asking me to go away. And you were not there cause you went into your house to get something but when you came out, your mam told you she didn't particularly like me. And she chased me away. That was depressin.

I am deliberately taking my own sweet time to get ready for school cause I am going to go grab a cab. Valentine's day and our six months anniversary is coming. But you told me not to spend the unnecessary dosh on you. Don't blame me if I do, or if I don't. I might already have the near-perfect gift for you. So shh about it boo. -knuffel- As long as it brings a smile to your face, I'm more than happy to do it for you.
Baobei, so sorry about last night again. I can't explain what got into me but urm, I promise that I'd try to make sure that it never happens again, ok? Cranky Alessa on the loose. One word can only pop into my mind: DANGER!

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Had korean bbq at Seoul Garden today with my boo. Surprised him at school today when I decided to look for him. Missed him so much that I just wanted to go over to see him and accompany him, however, think I may have disrupted his efficiency while working. So happy to see him. I hope he was glad to see me too. Oh well, I think I may be falling sick. Started to sneeze real bad in their lab and I feel so cold nowadays.. Brrr

School starts again. -sigh- Lemme see, how many more weeks of school? There's about only 9 more weeks of school!!! I can endure it. I know I can. Dad told me that we may be going to Thailand again for spiritual visit this march. I can't wait for that! I really love going back to thee barn - krungthep. Feel so at home there esp. when people start speaking to me in Thai... Oh well, but nothing's confirmed yet, so...we'd just have to wait and see.

Despite recent economy downturn, my red packet collection of bling bling has increased! : ) Let's just say I am a very fortunate and lucky girl. All of the bling bling has to go into my bank account that is so-called "untouchable" though. Have been doing that since young, but it's okay. I probably shouldn't spend it anyway. Haha. Anyway, 11 more days of Lunar New Year, so bring on the visiting! I still have to go friends visiting. -laughs- Or whatever you people call it. And yes, I am pathetic.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S Hi Baby! You're my lost loyal blog reader. Love you!
And of course I love you for various other reasons too... Suddenly I wanna go to New York with you.. Call me mad.

Which would you choose?
Nokia 6100, Nokia 6610, Nokia 7210, Nokia 8855 or the new upcoming Nokia 7250 or the Nokia 3650?

Okay, screw it, forget about the latter 2 phones. : )
Which one would you choose if you were me? Someone's feeling generous..

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S Really miss Edric hun now. : )

To all my fellow bloggers and friends and to those who celebrate or don't celebrate Chinese New Year:

Gong Hei Fat Choy!

Happy Lunar New Year my friends! May the year of the goat be a better one! Urm, I am not good in Chinese at all, so something about prosperity your way, business for you all be boomin, studies improvin, wishin you and your family the pink of health and happiness and wealth come your way!

Haha, I am such a dork. Gonna go get ready already. Today's outfit? Black sexy tube dress and heels. No, I am not superstitious! -laughs-

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

I am way ahead in my homework and revision. I guess I can't be bothered with anything else except my family, school and friends like Mich, Bri, Denise and a few more..and not forgetting, my greatest love of all, Edric. I just want to get the next few months in school over with. I need to move on. I feel like I am moving way ahead of everyone and people around me are so, I don't know... stuck? I was talking to Eve yesterday and we both agree that the whole scene here about most kids here just sit and dream, sure they have dreams and aspirations, but honestly, I don't see them working towards it? It just gets me down but I then think, why bother? It's their life, not mine.
The people in school need to grow up. That's all I have to say. It'd be mad fun if Mich was here with me! That lil girl is gonna break hearts here. -laughs-

Anyway, just watched Jennifer Lopez's new video with LL, " All I have". I like it so much! Thanks to Bryanna Giesbrecht for sending it over. MuchMusic and TRL totally rocks. : )

I got my really gorgeous skirt back from Mich today, met her in town and mom picked us up. We both got our black & white halters too. I saw this pair of black loafer like shoes from Agnes B. So gorgeous! Might consider buying it after new year, cause I still wanna get my sparkly canvas, and besides, I have 4 new pairs of ankle calfs black sexy heels and my new nine west wedges. : )

Baby and I are much much better! So glad we could have moved on, though it took time, I didnt mind the wait. For every step I took to making things better, I hope you can see that I really mean it from all my heart. Baobei, you mean the world to me too! I saw the sms yesterday and I was so pleased, its been so many days since you've been affectionate to me.. I knew from the start that you were really treating me good when you were always affectionate to me, and I told you before that's what I really like about you cause we both never have a problem with P.D.A.. and when it was suddenly gone for like 4/5 days, it really felt so empty, like someone just sucked a part of me away. You have no idea how glad I am things are starting to turn around.. -smiles- Sarang Hae yo..

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S Check out this korean mtv "Kiss - because i am a girl"
IT'S SO SAD! Thanks Miky (tayre) for letting me in on this video and song!

Dear readers, If you're reading my blog, please bear with me, the next few entries for sometime would be directed towards my baby. It's important that he gets this daily dosage of extra love right now..

Baby, last night we hung up wierd again. Why? Our conversation was going fine before that, even made plans to go to Chinatown on Cny Eve, etc. Whenever you mention that prick, you totally changed, sometimes I don't want to talk about him, but if you ask, I'd tell you... I wouldn't hide anything from you. I am trying so hard to reassure you as much as I can, but you don't seem to want to listen to me and you then tend to focus it all on him. I am not complaining or anything, it makes me only more determined to do it right. I don't want you to not feel hurt just to make me feel better, I want you to feel better on all your part, don't bother about me at all. It's not important to me at all. You asked if I found this whole thing tiring, tiring to tell you it all didn't mean a thing, tiring to try to reassure you?
I've only got one answer.
Never.

I wish I could take it all back, but it happened, I can't. I don't want to bear the though of you not being able to forgive me and just let it go. It may take days, weeks, months or years... but I am not going to just give up all like that. If you can always pacify me whenever I am in one of our moods, don't see why I can't do that for you.. It's nothing much, but I see that as the first step to making it all right again. If I don't call you or send you a message today, I'm sorry, don't think of it as I am not thinking of you, cause you're on my mind 24/7. I just don't really know how to react to 2 whole abso-fucking-lutely miserable nights of phone conversations. Please take care of yourself...
I love you..

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

I miss my hunny bunny. I really hope you're feeling a tad better. Just don't want to see you in pain, the thought and feel of being betrayed and hurt by a loved one is the one most painful feeling anyone can go through. Remorse is all I feel. I'd make it all right again... You're way too important and special to lose. You're family...

I've known him for 203 days. These have been the best 203 days ever, whether it's an up or down. Everything with you is a learning experience, you have taught me so much and I had to go and almost lose this absolutely smart and loving "teacher". Now, why on earth would I do that? Without you, who's going to teach me to be a better person and the many lessons needed to be experienced in life? Yesterday, Denise said after being with you, I've changed, and for the better. It made me smile.. Because she made me realise it was all because of you. I knew it... you simply bring out the best in me. : )
I love you so dearly Edric...

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Listening to this song makes me feel even worse.. Why? Look at this..

The beautiful days are long gone
I can’t seem to breathe
It feels like it hasn’t been that long
Since you walked away from me
Now I can try to act real strong
But you and I both know I still think of you that way
You should know…that

The beautiful lights the star filled nights
They don’t mean a thing
Cause you were my star and so it don’t seem right
Without you here with me
Now I can try to act real strong
But you and I both know its hard for me to say
You were my soul…

Now I could say that I don’t love you no more
And I could say that I’ve closed the door for our love
And I can tell you I feel It’s time for us to go our separate ways
But baby I just wouldn’t be the same
Cause girl your love is still on my brain

Now when your in love it takes time to heal
When someone’s broken your heart and changes how you feel
Girl I thought that you’d never do me that way
But even after all I still think of you that way

Now I could say that I don’t love you no more
And I could say that I’ve closed the door for our love
And I can tell you I feel It’s time for us to go our separate ways
But baby I just wouldn’t be the same
Cause girl your love is still on my brain

Now love is a game that we both like to play
But will I win or lose if I go or if I stay
Even though I try to hide my broken heart inside
Girl you know me inside out and I can’t get you off my mind

Now I could say that I don’t love you no more
And I could say that I’ve closed the door for our love
And I can tell you I feel It’s time for us to go our separate ways
But baby I just wouldn’t the same
Cause girl your love is still on my brain

I shan't talk about my weekend clubbin cause it was a stupid experience. This song seems to make me think what he's thinking.. One foolish mistake can cause so much heartache. Based on everything he's said yesterday over at my place and on the phone, this song seems to tell me everything he's feeling. Baobei, I am sorry. I know I have said it countless of times, but I mean it sincerely. I want to make it up so badly to you. Your perception of me has probably changed and it just frightens me at how things can change overnight. You have every right to hate me or avoid me, but I am not going to let you do that all alone. I've given too much into this whole relationship, my everything, all feelings, I hate to see it all go down like that. I never thought it would be so possible. Last night, you said you were selfish, because you should be thinking about my feelings too, but I'm okay, I'd deal with myself on my own.. You're always more important and I just want to make you feel assured that it was a moment of folly, not even being rational there and then. You're on my mind 24/7 and how you're feeling also affects me. Right now, my number 1 prorioty is to make you feel better and slowly start to accept me again. I know you're hurting bad and it hurts an awful lot for me too, it hurts to see you this way and it's because of a silly mistake I made.
I'm not ashamed to say that it's all my fault and that I deserve this treatment from you. And I am not afraid to tell the whole world that I was foolish and made a dumb mistake and willing to go all out and make it all right again. So Baobei,

I am sorry...

I love you baby, if not the same, I love you more.. It shows that I do mean a lot to you, even if I had "find out" this way. I know we'd make it through, we talked about our future, and I am confident we'd make it. I thought about it and I have to learn how to be the stronger person especially if I want to make it all right. Hunny, I love you.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

He called me again.
Please don't do it... Why do you always make me cry?
I hate you Philip

song playin - still on my brain

Raining outside, listening to my new CD.. Isn't this a great song? Thanks to Adriana (Andy's lil sis) for my birthday present. She got me the Justin Timberlake CD. Thanks sweety. And also, thanks to Gin & Mei for the interesting read. I'd make sure I'd make that light reading. : ) I love all my b-day presents!



Little Bear in Times Square's Food Court.
In loving memory.. mummy is so sorry.. : ( Daddy... I miss him so much!

Listening to this song, actually makes me think of some things... I opened my folder entitled "HongKong". There, holds my memories with my darling fiance. It's been about 1 1/2 months since the trip. Funny, it seems like such a long time ago yet at the same time, it seems like it was just yesterday.
I remember the first night we arrived, when it was raining. I remember it when you held my hand, took care of me. I remember it when you told me how pretty I looked. I remember you buying me my first "Yang Guang" orange juice. I remember walking with you in sleazy WanChai and then going to Conrad for drinks. I remember telling you how unreal it all feels like. I remember holding your hand while walking along Causeway Bay. I remember you hugging me whenever I felt cold. I remember you protecting me whenever we were walking in crowded places such as MongKok, Tsim Sha Tsui, etc.
I remember what brought us closer. I remember waking up to you every morning. I remember it all. That's when I realised it, you really love me. Which is why shortly after the trip, we got engaged.
I miss HongKong...


Edric, I have to apologize for last night when I just shouted at you, not wanting to talk to you. I really wasn't tired. I just felt very uncomfortable physically and emotionally. Physically? I don't know why, I was just in pain, I had terrible chest pains and I felt like I was going to just pass out from pain. I can't describe what kind of pain I was feeling, but I just felt like... passing out?
I missed you so much last night. You didn't have to come over. It was 2 a.m. hunny. I know how tired you must have been. I apologize for everything. I can't explain why I act like such a big baby at times. You really have to accomodate to me, don't say that it's nothing, because I know me, I know it must be awful to keep putting up with me and just giving in all the time. I am sorry if I make you tired..both physically and mentally, emotionally.
I love you hunny. Nothing's going to change that, if loving you is the impossible, you can always rest assured that I will go all out to make it the possible.
Ik hou van u mijn dear liefste....

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Officially tired. I actually studied today. : ) Feel like I accomplished something today. Hopefully, I don't forget what I learnt. -laughs-



Pic of the day: Janice, Me, DD at my dining room on 17th Jan, birthday celebration.

I need to go thru my notes again to check if I have forgotten anything. I doubt it. : ) Ah, screw it, I shall take a break... Study tomorrow!
I miss my baby. I want a hug.. -sigh-

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Sex and the City



I absolutely love this show!
I really do!



And guess what? I have all the 3 seasons of DVD! : ) Jealous?
I can't wait for season 4, 5 and 6 to be out on DVD!


I want the book too!!

I don't want season 6 to be the last season. Stupid HBO! This is such a good show!! Damnit -cries- I love SJP's new hair! Rock on my 4 favourite fictitious New Yorkers! Congratulations to Kim (samantha) for winning best supporting actress at the 60th Golden Globe Awards! : )
Will blog later...

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

3rd blog of the day

The week of new year of sometime in feb, I decided I shall give my webpage a little uplift. I can't really be bothered about it for now. Have more important stuff to do, like school, family, my thai lessons, driving and maybe dance and drama again? : )
I am so pissed right now! I really wanna give that loser a big shout but he doesn't dare to pick up his phone. Hey girls, ignore this loser name JARED. His number is 97823900. Call him and tell him what a loser he is if you want. I don't care, I am going to immature and put his number on a lovers site for gays. Haha, never offend me. He called my best friend Michiyo a bitch and for that he dies. And guess what, when I told him never to bother to contact me again, he calls me a petty and starts with the names. I am so pissed. He is screening calls and I wanted my baby to help me out call him, but I can't seem to get Edric.: ( Damn, if any of my friends are reading this, JARED THE LOSER's number is 97823900. He's a shorty (for guys.) He's only about my height which is 5'4.. and ugly and totally your disgusting guys who think he's got it.

Speaking on a happier note... here's a list of presents I got so far..
- Swarovski dove brooch (thanks boo)
- Sort of antique like thing with our picture in it from boo. (i love this best!)
- Dior black ring with red beads
- Guess denim bag (the one I was eyeing all along)
- Black tube dress..(very gorgeous)
- Seksi new black heels
- Stuffed toys and photo frame
- Folli Follie earrings (very gorgeous indeed candice!)
- Anklet
- Handmade earrings
- Anklet, earrings, necklace, rings, chocolates hamper style from Eua
- Loadsa dosh
- Home-baked birthday cake
- New book and comic book of Baby blues
- J.Lo Glow (again)
- More moolah..hehe $$$
- Shopping voucher for Topshop
- Swensens voucher
- funds for my digital camera : )
- MaxMara black chiffon like top
- Paul Frank stuff
- a couple more stuff..and more to come! : )

Thanks everyone. I love you all.

alessa aloka
xoxo

By the way, I was bored, so I did a little calculation. From 9th August 2002, Baby boy and I have been together for 163 days... There'd be another 21 more days till we reach our 6 months anniversary! This is a major record for Alessa! (cause her relationships only have a one month validity before she gets bored and chucks the guy aside..aye mich?) And guess what? There's only 202 more days till our 1 year celebration. How exciting! : )

I love you baby cakes.

song playin - satisfaction


Okay, I need to get this album. Initially wanted to get it when it first came out but decided to skip it and buy all my other records. But ever since I borrowed it from Cheryl, I am too hooked onto it. I plan to get it by the end of this week.
And also, I need to do my new year shopping this week. I need a pair of black pants, more tops and shoes. I've got enough heels already. And what else? That's all I need I guess. But basically, I just want to get my Dior sunnies from the boutique and a pair of shoes and also black pants and my Eve CD.
That's all. No more.

Got a bunch of great b-day presents..and more to come.. : ) Thank you everyone for all the lovely presents. And thanks to Kieran and co for the birthday cake that day... Shall blog more later about my b-day. Got to do some shit first. Thanks again! Now, 364 more days till my next bday. -laughs-

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S Candice sweety, I wanna streak my hair too!!

Happy 19th Birthday to me!

Just got back from Phuture/Zouk. Feel kinda dizzy, think I drank too many different kinds of drinks..
Thanks to Candice, Eve, Janice, Denise, Ginny, Derrick. Jackie, Daniel, Shirl and Sean and Edric baby for making it all worthwhile. : )
Thanks to those who sent their love and for all your lovely presents. It's just the start of my birthday...so let's see what kind of saturday birthday I'd have. -smiles-
Gonna zonk off to bed now. Having lunch with family tomorrow..

I wanna dance more...

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

monday, tuesday, , wednesday, , thursday, , friday, saturday


Guess what ling made for me? Knowing I am such a huge J.LO fan, I thank for her for such a sweet present! : ) Thanks sooo much for the love and wishes. xoxo

The partying night is here. I am not in a particularly good mood. One more question about what and how I am going to spend my 19th birthday on Saturday (not today), and I'd absolutely strangle the person. I don't even feel like doing anything thanks to a certain someone.
I won't let that get to me today, not today. Not the one day where I can see Candice again, Val, Eve, Mich, Ivan & Nick.. It has been ages since we last met. This would be a good time to catch up. God, I miss eve and candice so much. Anyway, rock on. I just want my Tom Collins.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

New Year's Eve - Singapore Expo Ministry of Sound

Yes Ekka! : ) Dave Seaman performed for us. Baby, surprised to how I got the pic scanned? : ) Why don't be! Your baby girl is really resourceful. Aw, he's right. I love that pic of us! A pic of one of our fave. past-times. -grins- How schweet. I love that pic too! Okay, I am dedicating today's blog to you Edric. Words can't describe it, but thanks for putting up with me. I know I am not one of the nicest person to hang out with at times so I know what you have to endure, etc. You're so sweet to do so. Call it love I suppose? Then you must be very magnanimous. I like it best when you tell me how much you love me. I honestly feel so blessed! Boo boo, where are you now? I sent you a SMS and a message over ICQ but you didn't reply. And you usually call randomly just to say 'hi' but you didn't today... : ( Did I do something wrong?
Ik misje je! Last night when we were talking over the phone, I thought you said something really sweet... Call me silly, but I still remember.. You said this:
he - do you love me?
me - of course i love you silly...
he - oh good, cause i love you too... i love you so much *pause* dunno what i'd do without you...promise you will never leave me?
me - *smiling* i promise...promise never to leave you..
he - oh good good!
Daiyo, isn't he so sweet? I know, I know.. You must be thinking I am some sory of psycho.. remembering such minor details from my conversation with my boo. But it's just this little things that makes you smile and be thankful for someone who can love you and complete you. Who would have thought? -smiles-
Alessa's finally found the one.

I love you Edric.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday
Guess what? I got my words to stretch out on my own!! : )
Clever? -grins-

So whatchya think of my new new template? : ) Pretty isn't it? I can't seem to know how to change the length of the words to stretch it out, if any of you do know how to do it, pleeaasse send me an email at oriental_alessa@hotmail.com (thanks a mil)

Up early today. School starts at 1 and I am skipping 2 lectures cause I need to go get some things done. Shit, better read notes and revise... Don't wanna fall back behind schedule. Baobei, sorry if last night I acted all cranky and shit. I always do it to you and you're always the unfortunate one who have to bear with it. Really, so sorry. I don't know what got into me either, just that urgh sometimes I am such a major bitch and I let that side of me come out and snap right at ya. I feel so bad, but nothing was wrong, I'm just tempermental. I am so scared that because of that, one day you gonna realise that I am treating you so bad and you gonna wanna leave me for someone better, someone who can treat you right.. It's such a bad trait I've inherited and cultivated. I don't mean it okay, and I know you gonna say
"it's okay, silly, i know you don't mean it.."
"i know you love me.. i love you too"
"you're not mistreating me.."

But baby, I am! I am sorry, will make it up to you. Promise and cross my heart. I love you.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday, SATURDAY

Love you Baobei.
Thanks to mich and andy for the lovely black seksi dress and gorgeous hella seksi heels. Yes, we'd make head turns, haha, and do my hair in a low classy ponytail aye? Can someone loan me your digicam? Mine's not with me and I won't get it back for a long time. Or should I just buy a new one? Afterall, I've been eyeing one for so long but aye, so broke. See first.

I know I promised the pics from NYE would be put up but silly boo boo took the pics and I cant scan them. Bear with me.
Birthday coming. Once again, Bring it on. No longer moaning I guess.
-does the chicken dance-
Hung out with babycakes too. It was so nice though we hung out for like 2-3 hours only.... But it was nice to fool around and act like a total monkey. Miss you boo. Thanks for the mango cake. : )

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

My tummy hurt earlier, which is fine now, between the times of 1245 noon to 1600 hrs, my head was spinning and I nearly fainted. Why? I felt as if I consumed either really bad wine or really strong red wine. I only go dizzy like that if I have too strong a red wine..so why? I think I did faint and drop in my room though cause at 6-ish my dad woke me up and I don't even remember going to sleep. Am I dying?

hands are itching like mad now and so is my face. I am preparing something and it makes me hand itch. I hope it's worth it. Better taste good. Stupid sap. Ow, now my nose itches. -scratch scratch-
Want to die today, die, die, die. -wails- And it's miserable cause I don't get to see my hunny bunny. Grrrrrr. Moo, I miss you. My mother washed "blankie" and it doesn't smell like me and you anymore. -sigh- I hope this day ends well. Only about 3 more hours.
Wish me luck.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday
In 5 days time, there'd be dinner and drinks at my place. In 5 days time, I'd have people reminding me of my life spent. In 5 days time, we'd do a countdown for my 19th birthday on 18th Jan (sat). Man, I'm old.

This is honestly the first time I am getting all freaky about my b-day. Its only a year more! What the heck? Maybe it's because of my last year of being an official teen. So shoot me now, but part of me is so excited turning older soon, with my degree and masters and maybe a PhD? -laughs- I just want to give my parents the life they deserve. It's time their money-consuming daughter buy them their dream house in Volendam. I know how much you miss that place mammy and daddy.
Anyhow, who's afraid of whom now? Hurry and let me get over with it. : )

Ah, this friday, looking forward to seeing Candice and EVE! Michelle *boyfriend* (grins), Ivan & Nicholas, Winnie, hopefully Val, Shirl, Jess, Gin, Mei, DD and their dates or friends, Daniel and of course, my boo. What's a special occasion without your lover? My fiance would always be a part of everything I do. Anyway, I have yet to confirm the list so... Mich, of course you can always pop by with Andy! Just remember what we said about the rest ya! After getting high at my place, we'd all head to Zouk, actually Zouk or Phuture, either one, it's fine as long as I get me my lychee martini and apple shooters again. Damn, what would I do without these 2?
Hope I dont get pissed ass high till I make a mockery outta myself. I doubt it. Know what I feel like doing? Eating cake. -laughs-
Actually I AM starving now. Oh, gonna find some snacks and watch "Sex & the City" again. -laughs-

Sex. MmmMMmmMMmmm...

I am a retard aint I? Say it you loons.

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S Just in case my boo thinks I don't love him... ALESSA LOVES EDRIC. Hunny, miss you sooooo much! I want a hug & kiss NOW goddamnit. -muah-

Just watched new vid from Ashanti and Ja Rule "Mesmerize" off Ja's latest album "Last Temptation"

Fucking good.

*NEW*song playing - No More *NEW*
(one word = feel)

Had a date with Edric last night. Met at 7-ish at my place and then headed to town. Had reservations for 2145 hrs movie of US version "The Ring" at Cine. It wasn't as scary or freaky as the Japanese one, which I can proudly say I wasn't thinking about it at all. I just got jumpy during the movie I admit. But at least I watched the entire movie this time, not like the Jap one. -laughs- I had to watch it twice cause I closed my eyes so often and missed bits of it. Anyway, felt really bad for Edric cause I dragged him all the way down to forum (practically the start of Orchard Rd) to go to Song+kelly21 to get my tubey dress but it was closed. I was so bummed but then I suppose maybe it just wasn't meant to be.. And he wanted to eat jap food but it was all my fault...he got stuck with yoshinoya instead. So sorry hunny, didn't mean to make your dinner that way, knowing that you didn't like Yoshi...

I ate my first proper meal yesterday with desert (amos cookies) yesterday for the first time this week. Guess what? I am actually 49.5kg now, not bad for a girl of 1.63m stature. That's 5'4 and weighing a decent 108 lbs now. Damn, it used to be 110 lbs...which made it a PERFECT match.. Do you know I used to weigh 48 kg when I was 14? And then by the time I was clubbing on a regular basis (ahem -looks at mich and bri- rem our funny ass venom days?), with all the dinners with drinks at nooch, marriott and sushi tei and not forgetting quick bites at MacDonalds outside Shaw before hitting the clubs again AND ALSO, our late night suppers at home with pjys parties and who could forget Coffee Club Express at Cine? (HOW COULD THEY CLOSE THAT?!?! DAMNIT) Yes, anyway, back to the point...Yes, by the end of that wild year, within 2 years, I actually weighed 54 kg! Know what the amazing thing was? You could hardly see it, sure I knew I put on weight but it wasn't so visible, but I honestly knew and it bugged me. 2 years later..well actually 3, considering I'm nearing 19 (fuck!), I'm actually a nice decent 49.5 kg now. How amazing is that? But know what the best part of it is? Over these past few years, I've learnt that women can never can satisfied with their body no matter what unless they just work their asses off or just accept the way they are and live healthy. And that's what I am. I've accepted the way I am. Sure I gorge down chocolate cookies, ice-cream, doughnuts, candy, loadsa alcohol and shit, but I also eat plenty of greens, and by greens, I mean not with creamy sauce, etc... I love my body. I love my ass but of course, I could afford to lose a bit off my thighs. -laughs- Who doesn't?

Anyway, went down to Zouk at around midnightish... Met up with Daniel and friends. Didn't dance much with Edric. He just sat at Phuture at the bar, drinking and doing something else which I totally hated. Oh well, I've completely given up on that, he can ***** his lungs out for all he wants. I don't give a fucking damn anymore. Anyway, I missed the apple shooters! Hella missed it and the lychee martinis! Oh my lord, apple shooters are the sweetest ever. Now I want a Comsopolitan.. No I am not an alcoholic. Oh, I saw Narumi yesterday at Phuture, just smiled and waved at her cause she was busy making out with Sunny! WHEN WAS SHE EVER GOING OUT WITH SUNNY???????? WTF? No one told me that! Least I got to dance my ass off last night. Thinking of joing Candice and Dawn to "Tha Wu Bar" tonight.. or maybe "illusion". I'd see how things go, since I'm not buying the dress anymore, I have 209 dollash to splurge on drinks and shit.
Kill me now.

I hate my birthday coming up. The people that make me the happiest aren't making me happy or around. Is this the start when I am going to celebrate lonely birthdays? Screw it. I don't need to be reminded that life is short.

I made this for my hunny. Running out of my creativity soon enough. -laughs- Tomorrow's friday! I so cannot wait. I am dying for the weekend, although I have plans unmade and shit. Who's gonna go shopping with my on Saturday? Someone, be nice, take me shopping and I'd buy you ice-cream, or a doughnut! -smiles-

Did I mention how much I love Edric? I truly do. Yes, I AM GOING TO BE SELFISH. I am going to hold on tightly to him for the rest of our lives. So blessed is what I am to have found my calling. I didn't know I could care so much for someone, didn't know I was able to be willing to give up so much for him. Love is amazingly beautiful isn't it? This is one relationship where I don't feel like I am suffocating, or where I don't feel as if I am giving for nothing... It makes me feel so amazingly be myself and calm at the same time, where I can be the one true person, reflecting the inner flaws which everyone just wants to hide under their own surface.. I can finally be me. Plus, he has shown me things I've never known I was capable of. It makes me feel so good that I'm able to make my significant half feel happy too. I've finally understood the true meaning behind "It's better to give than to receive."
Boo, we're engaged. And we'll be for a long time because like we always said, we're gonna stick to each other for a lifetime. Too bad, like it or not, I am on you. -laughs-
Happy 5 months Boo

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

Oh lord, I am craving for my mum's Tom Yam Soup.
She really does make the best and also not forgetting her green curry, ohh, and her dry fried tom yam prawns and also paad thai! : )


Dinner on my own tomorrow. How depressing.
Food food food. That's all I need, other than my boo. He made my day today. I love you so, Edric!

love
alessa aloka
xoxo


BY the way

""Which cocktail are you?""
brought to you by Quizilla

Manolo Blahnik.

For the past 2 weeks from last last Thursday, I have to admit, although I am running absolutely low on funds, I have scouting around for Manolo Blahnik heels. Any luck? Nooooo... No luck at all. His shoes are so amazingly pretty (but so are my new heels!)
Best part is, I just found out the killer boots J.Lo wears in "Jenny from the block" are custom made Manolo Blahnik only available in EU. Apparently, Amerie has been seen wearing it and a few other phat stars.


Guess what? I found a way to purchase them, but they cost US$1000! Daddy, guess I know what I want for my b-day! -laughs- DAMNIT. They're so amazingly seksi.

Hey Edric, I seriously could wake up to you every morning, is that what our married life would be like? I am not complaining.. Nice to have you over like last time again baby boy. Ik hou van u -kusje op je voorfood en lippen-

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S SCHOOL IS A MAJOR PAIN

Daddy decided to spoil me today. Guess what he and mummy bought me?

One very seksi, versatile strappy heels from Studio
One simple cut black low heels from Studio
New Season of Guess Capris, edition three (god, i hate the sale items which are edition 2, cause they're awful!)
4 Paul Frank wristbands thingy..

I am in love with the Song+Kelly21 green tube dress. Should I? I can't believe it, I can spend over 400 on my custom made gucci shoes (thanks bri!) for order but I am contemplating about the dress. Should I? And I should go for the nine west red wedges? Oh pray tell...

I love my boo. Sarang Hae yo.

xoxo

P.S Also, I want my converse and diesel shoes! Oh and the Kenneth Cole red heels. So "sex n the city"
Yes, I finished all 3 seasons! : ) Waiting for the 4th and 5th on DVD now..hehe

this is a miserable day.
My sis left for sydney today. What the hell? First my brother goes and now my sis for 2 months and later in the year, she and Scott are gonna move to the states for good. My bro is living in Aust. for good. I am as good as an only child.
Oh shit, I miss my siblings so much, if you guys know how close I am to them both, it's such a miserable feeling. Me and my sis are tight, like we go out, drink, club, dress, laugh, travel, hang out with each other's friends together. How lucky can I get? I was trying so hard not to cry but I just teared and right now I feel like crying.

I feel so alone. It's so miserable. Dad and Mum tried to cheer me up and took me for ice-cream at Swensen's but it ain't the same. Me and my siblings are tight, we're friends, we're blood. And I just feel so alone in this empty big house...
Called my boo to talk, but he's asleep.
I wish I could talk to my bro but he's in town and my sis is on the plane. I was supposed to go new year clothes shopping with her, but since she's not here, my shopping companion is gone.. at least joni is here...

............

1st January 2003.

Hmm, funny how a new year doesn't seem to be like a new year anymore. It seems like an extra draggy 2002. Time seems rather standstill right now. I hope all of you had fun last night. I know I did.
Here's the deal
6ish - Dinner with Andy and my seksi crew, had my hair done.
7ish - Watched 2 episodes of "sex and the city" with my sis
8 sharp - Went to shower and get dressed. Along the way, my sister and I managed to successfully overturn the entire second floor of my house with clothes strewn everywhere, makeup lying around, hair grips missing, etc.
Went to meet Edric, Daniel and friend (no idea how to spell his name) at Windy Heights to go to Joni's place to get high.
9ish - Went up to Joni's place. Drank, drank, drank and ate tortilla chips and dip. Screwdrivers, caronas, chardonay, bacardi, vodka, teq, you want it, JONI has it all! -laughs- No sure if that's a very reassuring thing though. Basically, it was me, my boo, Dan and friend, my sis and Scott, Roger and Joni chilling, getting alcohol in our blood. I think I was pretty high cause I was very giggly according to my sister. : ) Boo had to go get Daniel drunk. Smart move. -grins-
10-ish or was it 11 - Went to train station to go to Expo. MAD LONG QUEUE! Daniel left a part of him and his guts in the train. So not pretty. -laughs-
Definitely 11ish - Had to queue, sis and crew got in already. We cut our way to the entrance with Eva. -laughs- Got my midnight kiss from Edric then, and I certainly don't complain about the way he snogs me. : )
12ish - PARTY TIME AT EXPO. Spent a while locating Sean, Shirl and Jess though. But soon made our way to Expo Hall 5 and honestly, Dave Seaman was abso-fuckin-lutely GOOD. Danced all our way through. Oh, Hunny dances well. Know what's the best part about having your lover with you dancing? You guys can do the dirty dance anytime and snog anytime you want and you don't have to worry about anyone hitting on you. : ) Did a lesbian dance with Jess and Shirl too, soon enough we managed to rope Sean and Eva in. -laughs- Yes, explicit pictures will be put up soon enough! Oh, at about 3ish, alessa got molested! (other by Edric) Yes, I got molested by a caucasian woman. She just grabbed my hand and shaking her arse and soon, she was grabbing mine. So not funny, she gave me a new year hug and I think my boo too. Hella wierd. But basically, it was good good dancing. : ) Hands all over? You decide.
4ish/5ish - Left, met some ppl, went to meet Mark for supper.
6ish - WENT ALL THE WAY BACK TO SIMPANG BEDOK for Roti prata. What a fucking waste of time. -laughs-
7ish - Got home, literally ran all the way upstairs, got naked so quick, boo called, and jumped into shower, soon enough I smelt like Palmolive shampoo and Kodomo shower. : ) Fell asleep rightaway.

What a fantastic celebration. Got to be with my clubbing girls, old friends, sister, friends and my fiance. : ) And I got a workout too, alcohol and dancing. Who's complaining?
Pictures will be up soon! Just waiting for shirl and eva to develop it for me. Love you all for making it wonderful. Thanks for 2002 to Daddy, Mummy, Sis, Bro, Bri, Mich, Andy, Shirl, Willem, Gin and Mei and the rest of my crew...
Most of all, I love you Edric.
Hopefully, 2003 will be bigger and better!

Once again, HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Love
alessa aloka
xoxo

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Had my hair done, nails done in hot pink and flamingo pink french manicure, meeting my seksi crew for dinner and heading to Joni's meeting Edric there, my sis, Scott, Joni and drama peeps to get high before we head down to NYE 2002 at Singapore EXPO for M.O.S.
Ahhhh... I finally get to party again. : )
Bring on the fun.

Love
alessa aloka
xoxo

song playing - all i have (J Lo ft LL Cool J)

I am totally feeling this song. A remix of this song would be phat! Hell, I'd move to this song if you move your fine ass to the dance floor. -grins-
Uh-huh, everyone that knows me know I love J.Lo and her music. 24/7 rotation, be it on my laptop, whatsoever.
Anyway, quick blog before I go for dinner with my 'rents and sister. (she's moving to sydney for 2 months this friday. : (
Yep! Gonna go to Ministry of Sound at Expo on New Year's Eve with mah 2 fav. girls Shirlyn & Jess, Shirl's sis gonna be there too! And gonna meet with my sister, Scott, Joni and a couple of their friends too. Best part is, boo's coming with me! : )New Year's gonna be a blast. I get to party away and get my midnight kiss from my baby at the struck of 12! What more can I ask for?
Anyway, just a few pics from Australia. Enjoy. -smiles-





Now I miss my brother (Melvin) and Yen (our friend, well, my sister's Rafflesian friend which eventually became our lovely mate. : )

love
alessa aloka
xoxo

P.S Hi fiance. -knuffel- I miss you Edric. Can't wait to see you soon!

There there Andy, here's the picture you wanted. No idea why you like it so much. Wierdo.

Check out this picture! : )
Yen decided to be funny and play dead and lay down on the ground outside's Darling Harbour's Gloria Jeans/Starbucks/Macs. Not letting him win, my bro tagged him down and made me join in and we abso-fuckin-lutely refused to get up. In the end, Yen's face was all red and took him 5 mins to recover from 264 lbs of mass squashing him! : )
Haha, yes, I went wild in Australia. Wait till you see the clubbing pics. -grins-

xoxo

P.S WANNA GO TO Ministry of Sound at Expo on New Year's Eve! : ) I went to M.O.S in London and it was hella fun! Dope!! Wanna join? -winks-